Posted in Children

‘Life’ by Noodle.

I haven’t posted any of Noodle’s slightly eccentric comments recently (mainly because the boy is considerably cleverer than I am and I’m not always sure when he’s having me on and when he’s actually teaching me something – yes I have googled to check on more than occasion 😳😳)

But I wanted to share with you some gems from this week.

🔸He would like to start writing a diary because then when he becomes famous someone will put his diary in a museum and he likes the sound of that.

🔸He has acquired some binoculars and is spending his time stargazing, he is hoping to discover a new constellation but has his heart set on finding a comet so it can be named after him.

🔸He would quite like to buy a telescope to use alongside so he can search for one of the many overlooked dwarf planets that he can claim as his own and petition to have be given ‘planet status’. This will obviously be named after his also.

🔸He has developed an absolute love of history and has taken great delight in explaining to the younger Monkeys all about beheading, decapitation and, his most favourite term, execution.

🔸He has been introduced to Red Dwarf and is now an encyclopaedia of retro tv quotes and takes great satisfaction from informing people that are a Smeg Head or, more frequently, a total Gimboid.

So all in all a very educational week in The Circus but I think that my favourite so far is his attempt to explain the relationship between mass and speed to Pickle.

“Right. Imagine Mummy was driving in our car by herself, it would be quite light (No not like the sun you Gimboid, light in weight) and it could go quite fast. But. If a fat old tramp (no I’m not being rude you Smeg Head, I’m not calling anyone fat, I’m just describing a situation) wandered up and got in the car then it would be heavier and couldn’t go as fast. Because the heavier things move slower and lighter things can move faster”

I am, obviously, impressed with his knowledge of scientific concepts. I am, however, slightly concerned that he thinks that if a ‘fat tramp’ wandered into our car I would carry on driving.

I have to hold my hands up and admit I tuned out during my lesson about the finer points of the Magna Carta 🙈😳

Every days a school day. Thank goodness Pickle keeps me grounded with her beautiful yet worryingly farfetched tales of her riding on the backs of baby Flamingos and telling school that I let her burn herself on hot popcorn 🙄🙄

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